Oftentimes, I think about what my worst fear is. One that I’m sure is on the minds of many is death. It is unbelievably scary that no one can pinpoint when or how they’ll die or when they kiss a loved one goodbye if it’ll be the last time their eyes ever meet. This fear is logical and is most likely on the minds of many. Some other fears are specific to a certain group of people. Women worry when they’re a week late with their cycle and fear they might be pregnant before they’re ready, only to realize that their bodies are just playing tricks on them in some cases. Although this may be a fear for many women, my biggest fear, as a writer, is that no one will care to read what I have to say. That I will fade into oblivion and never become the writer of my dreams.

Now, this might be irrational, but I fear it so much that, ironically, it makes me stop writing. I have to make up something when people ask me what I enjoy writing about because I am too afraid my writing career won’t happen, and I never let it begin. Crazy, right? I tell myself that I’m too busy to write, but we’re always going to be busy. I tell myself that very line, yet I still fear that my writing will never be good enough. I don’t carve time to write because I fear if I do, no one will read a word. I even started my first manuscript, but once I got excited, I didn’t give it another glance. 

This is something that I have to work on because if I never develop my writing career, it will be my fault. I put everything else in front of my work, which is what many people tend to do in some form or another. Even if it isn’t a career, I’m sure many people put other less important things in front of what their main goal is, which is going to increase the fear of that goal fading away. I know mine is fading, but I’m not going to give up on it. I know the task of finding my writing groove isn’t going to be easy, but hopefully, my fear will go away with every word that gets written onto the page, as will yours.